Some things are better left in the past.

Like Nsync.

People are going apeshit ALL OVER my facebook and twitter.  Sending me fucking messages and texts.

"Are you excited?"
"Did you hear?"
"OMG OMG OMG"

It has clearly helped me to come to two very important realizations.

#1- who my real, honest, true, understanding, & intelligent friends are.
Did you send me a meme making fun of Nsync or more specifically a certain member? Then you are one of those friends. Did you not even acknowledge this stupidity? Yep, one of those friends.

If you called me or texted me or messaged me with one of the three above quotes, you suck.


#2- people clearly feel that any relationship you may have had with someone who is or was in the public eye is not subject to the same rules as any other.  If I saw that you ex just got a promotion, or I ran into him at the airport on his way to a first class trip around the world, do you want me to call you or text you and gush about it? "OMG He's flying first class to Fiji! And staying in one of those hotels over the water with a glass floor!" No, you don't, because you don't care.


Now the real truth is, I don't care. I haven't cared in a really long time. I love him. I'm not in love with him. I wish him well. Mostly, lol. That being said, I still don't wish to have him rammed down my throat the way it's been for the last 7 fucking days. I really, really, REALLY hope this is a one time thing. Because otherwise, I'm going to have to quit about 20 of my friends and shun the internet.

Here we go again...

You know, this summer was fucking amazing. I mean that. I was the best summer I have ever had in my life on every level. If I could live the rest of my life like the last three months, I would be happy forever.

But, obviously, real life doesn't work that way.

I went back to work after almost a month off. It's fine. It isn't good; it isn't bad. It just is.  I think I was hoping that after some time off and some fun and clearing my head, that I would go back there and love being a nanny again.  I don't.  I was hoping that I would be content and that I would not instantly be longing to do something-ANYTHING-besides what I am doing.

A week ago I thought I was even happy and content here, in Florida, with my friends and my life...but you know, that's just a facade too.

It's funny when you make the decision to start removing people from your life. It's almost dangerous. Because as hard as it is to make that first move, to rid yourself of people that are no good for you...once you make it, it's SO liberating. It feels SO good to not have to deal with drama and worry and stupidity. It almost feels SO good that you wonder about everyone in your life. You wonder how many strikes are enough to say enough. One? Ten? When does self-preservation become something else...something darker? When you start to feel let down by people you trust and then you get to the point that you have to question trusting anybody.