Reciprocating...

Here is where I go to vent...to say thing I think and feel but might not ever say in my real life, good and bad. It's Friday night, and I am venting. I'm worth more than I sometimes give myself credit for, and certainly more than I accept from other people. I truly believe in give and take and I know that in every relationship, there are times where you give more and times when you need to take more. Unfortunately, I often find myself on the giving end...and while this works for awhile, there inevitably comes a time when I begin to burn out and resent the situation. I could blame the other party...and sure, part of it is their fault. But if I was being honest, the blame lies with me, doesn't it? Because of it didn't, I wouldn't keep finding myself in this situation, would I? I am a self-sufficient girl. I take care of myself and I like that. I tell myself I'm super great all the time, because I think I am. It took me a long time to feel that way...a lot of abusing myself and letting other people abuse me, but I'm here. The thing is, if I'm going to be with you, as a friend or a lover, I'm going to affirm the shit out of you. I expect you to do the same. We are supposed to lift each other up, but there are some people in my life getting mighty fucking heavy because I'm doing all the lifting.