The more I think about it, the more I realize that all of my adult relationships...and I use the term 'relationships' lightly...have been played by someone else's rules. Not mutual rules, not even a compromise of both of our rules...but HIS rules.
And that's my fault, because I am passive, and I am a people pleaser, especially if you are a 'people' that I care about. I make excuses, I turn the other cheek, I trust too much and too easily, and I am about as naive as they come. So I am trying to figure out, now that I want to do something the absolute right way, how I get my rules acrossed without looking like a needy bitch.
And really, I am not a needy bitch. I don't NEED to know where you are at all times or who you are with or when you are coming home. I don't NEED to text you 386 times a day or call you 386 times a day or poke you every time I log into facebook. I don't NEED to be with you 24/7. I don't care that you have to work or want to go out with your friends or do whatever it is that you need or want to do to make you happy. Because that's all I want too.
What I DO need is that if you DO text me everyday and ask how my day is or tell me to have a good day and then you suddenly and inexplicably stop, you are prepared for me thinking something is wrong.
What I DO need is that if I am there for you every time you are upset or hurt or sick in any way that I can be, that when I am upset or hurt or sick, you are there for me in the same way.
I guess what I want is for you to treat me like I mean as much to you as you do to me...because that's how it should be, right? If it isn't, then that clearly would mean you're with the wrong person, right?
I don't think it's asking too much...but I have no idea how to assert it.
Maybe it IS asking too much after all.
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